In an Age of Rampant Bad Manners

The story about the parents of a five-year-old being sent a ‘no show’ invoice for £15.95 for failing to honour their word about their son’s attendance at his friend’s ‘slide and ride’ birthday party at a ski centre in Plymouth has hit the headlines.

The bill senders (the birthday boy’s parents) are getting some flack for issuing the invoice in the first place – I agree, a tad weird and certainly not the correct thing – but I do applaud their courage.

Especially given the Nash family had replied officially confirming their son Alex’s attendance but decided to go with, what will appear to the jilted hosts to be a ‘better offer,’ of a family day visiting relatives.

Supposedly no contact details were available for the hosts so the Nash’s couldn’t contact them to rescind Alex’s attendance.

As bizarre as this particular scenario may be, this family in Plymouth (hardly the party-centre of the UK, I admit) is just one example of the pandemic of party rudeness that has gripped the nation.

No one knows how to behave at parties anymore. Times change, I get it. But when it comes to the world of entertaining there are some areas that I feel should be sacrosanct.

As a regular host I can get quite worked up when I attend the events of others to see guests behaving in a fashion, which to my eyes, feels less than courteous.

Maybe attending

Hosts of any age are really asking for it when they opt to invite their chosen guests via Facebook.

Although it can be helpful for getting together large numbers of friends, it has its pitfalls – namely this magic third-option for soirées that Mr Zuckerberg has invented: maybe attending.

A guest is not ‘maybe’ attending. You’re either going, or you’re not. If you are unsure if you can go but need to check, hold off clicking anything. It’s quite simple.

Some techno-babe once told me why people often click maybe attending. She said that invited guests would feel like they’d offend the host by saying they weren’t coming.

Again, as a host, I know that not everyone can come to everything, but need to know final numbers so I know how many canapés to make. What would happen if all guests clicked maybe attending?

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