The 7 Doublethink Rules of Patriotism

I continually hear the words freedom and liberty chanted around me and prominently displayed on American homes and vehicles and in social media, so I know this must be something important.  I’ve also noticed that individuals, groups, and political candidates that oppose government intrusion into our lives are treated as social pariahs, so we have to dig a bit deeper to see what this American Freedom actually is.

It is a package deal that has primarily been assembled by neocons.  Mix together the various ingredients for the recipe and then add some red, white, and blue stuff that says “freedom” on it and you should be well on your way to American freedom.  It involves the following:

1. Brand yourself as a Christian. But beware; the precepts of Christianity may get in the way.  So, the branding should not be accompanied by a practice of the faith.  Confusing?  Well, it’s not actually that hard if you apply yourself to a diligent study under an apt tutor.  To accomplish this, it is beneficial to seek out a subset of “Christianity” that concludes – through theological somersaults – that the actual practice of the tenets of Christianity when dealing with your fellow man is inappropriate manifesting “legalism” or “salvation through works.”  This really is the key which allows you to subdue the objections of your conscience and to strive for a relaxed mindset while carrying a Book around that says to not steal, to love your enemies, and to live peaceably with others.  Actual practice of the teachings of the New Testament must be portrayed as trying to “earn your way into heaven.”

So, to be clear on this point, call yourself a Christian, but to avoid the practice of the faith and to have a relaxed mindset with your hypocrisy, adopt a convoluted intellectual argument  – surrounding New Testament verses negating Old Testament rituals – that concludes that those verses require you to avoid New Testament teachings as well.   I know that last sentence is complicated, but you will need to grasp this complex doctrine in order to put your mind at ease to fully implement your unique American Freedom.  It’s hard to do if you have an un-seared conscience, but work on it.  You can probably get there if you make fervent efforts to beat down the feelings of hypocrisy.  There are plenty of paid ministers of the fallen one to help you arrive at the uniquely American sweet spot on this bundle of spiritual issues.

And, since we are talking about freedom and liberty, call this new libertine aspect of your faith “Christian liberty” or “Christian freedom.”   There are no requirements to subdue bloodlust or covetous tendencies since we, after all, must sin all day every day.  To work in another direction would be evil.  Advocating goodness and the Golden Rule would be gross heresy.  Go down the wide easy path and preach continually – lest you forget – that true faith means that we must all sin continually, and that this realization is what makes us true Christians.  Easy peasy.  Behave horribly and wretchedly because this, in essence, is your new “Christianity.”  See how easy that was?  Good is evil.  Evil is good.  If it gets confusing, drop some more money in the plate and get a refresher.   In short, call yourself a Christian, but don’t act like one and you will have this one covered with plenty of lucre-generating theological literature and preaching to back you up.

2. Give vocal and ballot box support to the police state and military industrial complex. Now that we have Christianity out of the way and we have numbed our conscience into accepting perpetual evil in the name of our faith, it should be easy to ignore verses saying things like, “Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.”  We can’t do right anyway, so we might as well get all our basal urges to shed blood and enrich ourselves blessed by the state by claiming  that the American state, unlike us, is capable of taking the moral path.  Distorting Romans 13 to make the state into a god is key here.

If “we the people” vote for politicians that want to kill a lot of people and lock everybody else up, then this is a theologically endorsed expression of “Christian” freedom – which is actually a need to perpetually commit evil – if you were paying attention to item 1 in this list.   Get it?

So, to wrap up this point, “we the people” rule the government.  We vote for war-mongering politicians.  Violence and vengeance is not bad because the orders come from the state as per our ballot-expressed desires to kill ‘em all and let God sort ‘em out.   It takes some refreshing to remember how all the doctrinal pieces fit together into a cauldron of death and thievery.  If you accidentally stumble onto the Sermon on the Mount and read the Prince of Peace saying “love your enemies” and you need to get your evil spirit rekindled and re-justified, there are plenty of paid servants of hell who will re-shape your simple-minded reading of a doctrine of love, and get you back on the road to obligatory personal destruction – as a theological precept.    You know, so you can be “saved” from your confused thoughts that Christianity somehow relates to goodness.

3. Try to personally benefit from the police state and military industrial complex you supported politically in Item 2. Encourage your sons to get violence-mongering jobs.  We are the good ones (good in a metaphysical sort of way).  They are evil.  We work.  They are slugs.  We are the guards.  They are the inmates.   We produce by working for the state.  They steal.   We blow people up to administer justice.  They fight back when the freedom forces invade their homes.  Sometimes they harm blessed free Americans in the process.   Give into the rage.  Remember the whole vengeance is mine thing doesn’t apply to American Christians who are free from such legalistic constraints – especially when they work for the state god which can christen every evil thing thereby converting it into an object of unblemished purity.

4. Obtain your “due” from the welfare state. On this point I am, surprisingly, still talking about neocons.  I used to think that “conservatives” were opposed to the welfare state.  But, after careful review of the hidden lifestyles of the many neocons I know, I have realized that they believe they are entitled to, and are jealously guarding, all of the tax and Federal Reserve funded income streams that they benefit from.   It seemed like “conservatives” used to act like it was shameful to be on welfare or benefit from state-created wealth distribution schemes.  But, nowadays, practically every neocon family has broken through the wall of shame and has one or more members that benefit directly from state “disability” benefits, state mandated divorce wealth re-distribution schemes, workmen’s compensation, unemployment benefits, child and family services subsidies, and various other state welfare programs.  “Conservatives” aggressively – but silently – stake their claim to the proceeds of these socialist state programs.

5. Oppose free human migration. Actually just oppose immigration to the United States.  Americans – due to their exceptionalism and manifest destiny – should be able to get a visa to travel to any country in the world.  See number 4 for the rationale on this one.   Keep that welfare money for us.  If you are a neocon, don’t ever talk about your welfare entitlements out loud, but remember that these are your benefits.  American benefits.  This is an American printing press.  We must limit its output to American pockets.   Use some other made-up excuse – like terrorism – to justify your opposition to immigration, but keep your eye on the prize:  your welfare entitlements as a neocon.

6. Oppose international free markets for labor and consumer / producer goods. Once again, keep that printing press money going into American government-connected pockets even if American consumers get less value for their money and even if non-crony American businesses suffer losses from retaliatory trade practices from other countries.

7. Endorse licensing schemes that enrich state-run universities and create monopolies that cause products and services to be more expensive for the public. We must have tiered systems to keep otherwise competent people  – who haven’t signed up for bank-enriching government student loan programs – out of higher paying jobs.

We also have heard a lot about how Americans fought for “freedom.”  How we fought for religious freedom and economic freedom.  How statism and war keeps us “free.”  How people hate us because we are free.  What is this elusive phenomenon?  A lot of the things on this list don’t seem to be related to freedom.  But, they are associated with the flag waving and the American Freedom label and are part of the package deal.  So, what is the bottom line on American Freedom?

Well, American freedom apparently means endorsing and using state force to obtain any monetary benefits you can grab for yourself at the expense of others, either through inflationary theft or theft by taxation.

It is the acted-upon desire to huddle around a central bank that produces enormous amounts of watered down unearned money and to build walls to keep others – like foreigners and non-monopolists – away from that money spigot.   And throw in for good measure a lot of central bank funded violence to enforce state defined “morality” that unleashed “Christian” statists are not subject to.

When I took a break from this article and drove to the boonies to replace a submersible well pump, I heard “One Tin Soldier” playing on the oldies station.  It is a song about a greedy people butchering another kingdom in a useless war.  It does a good job of describing the beliefs of modern freedom-chanting Americans:

“Go ahead and hate your neighbor,

Go ahead and cheat a friend.

Do it in the name of Heaven,

You can justify it in the end.”

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Yay freedom!